First published in Verve Man, March 2019
Picture Colin Firth in a lake (you’re thinking of that scene from Pride And Prejudice, aren’t you?). Now picture him with glasses on, smiling at you with that trademark grin that makes your ovaries explode. Which Firth won? Ah, a good pair of spectacles — rimless, half-rimmed, full frame, whatever they may be: making the good-looking men infinitely hotter and upping the appeal of the not-so-good-looking ones since the beginning of time (or actually, since they were invented eight centuries ago).
And it’s not just me who has this opinion. Bollywood has agreed with me for years. Remember the two-Hrithik movie, Kaho Naa…Pyaar Hai? What did the director do to tell the audience that the lookalike of the heroine’s dead sweetheart was not an innocent boy but a suave, sexy young man? You guessed right: he gave him a pair of rimless glasses. And you would be colouring the truth if you denied that you swooned for Shahid Kapoor in Jab We Met just a little more than you did for him in any of his other movies, simply because that chashma on his face made the chocolate boy a bit yummier than usual. And coming to my eternal favourite, we all know that Shah Rukh Khan is one of the most intelligent and well-read people in the industry. And when SRK puts on his glasses with those red temples (that’s what the arms of the spectacles are called, did you know?) to read out a speech or give a talk, you just know you’re in for a great deal of gyaan that’s sure to make the sapiosexual within you orgasm more than once.
You see a man with specs, and it just automatically ups his intellectual quotient…though, I’ll admit from experiencing many a disastrous date, sometimes it’s only until he opens his mouth! Also, Bollywood-lovers, you’ll be kidding yourselves if you say your heart didn’t skip a beat when the Raj we all love from Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge slid his round glares halfway down his nose to give a dimpled smile to a hitchhiker while riding his bike in the song Mere khwabon mein….
’Tis true then, if the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, a way to some girls’ (mine, anyway) hearts is through classy eyewear. And now I’m going to go picture Colin Firth, with a pair of glasses perched on his nose, reading beside a lake in the British countryside….
Huzan Tata 